Where to Meet a Rich Woman, Part 2

All right! Where to meet wealthy women, Part 2, continues today!
(In case you missed it, here is Part 1 on where to meet a rich woman)

You won’t find a high-class dame hanging out at a Jiffy Lube, no sir. Think you’re going to meet a sugarmama at your local discount grocery? Well, that’s just silly – no one rich is going to touch that cut-rate beef (or your cut-rate beef for that matter, if you insist on looking poor). You’ve got to go where the money is. Follow the money! Many affluent women enjoy fancy foods & luxury shopping. Here’s the lowdown on these types:

The Foodie Sugarmomma

The foodie sugarmomma’s haunts are fancy cafes, tea houses, chocolate shops, bakeries, restaurants, and high end supermarkets. Any specialty shop is a good bet. Butcher shop specializing in cows fed pure grass and shiatsu massaged daily? Check. Artisanal froufrou candy shop featuring sweets sculpted in the form of famous feminist writers? Check. Tea house specializing in oolong leaves hand picked by angelic 12-year-old albino eunuchs from blessed tea bushes in the Dalai Lama’s backyard? Well…you get the idea.

How to Approach the Rich Female Foodie
Read up on the latest food trends. Watch Alton Brown’s super-educational videos. Learn about molecular gastronomy. When you meet the foodie sugarmomma, you’ll have an arsenal of knowledge with which to attack her doughy mind – mmmmm, that sweet, sweet, doughy mind. Once you’ve been talking for a few minutes, offer her a sample of exotic chichi sweets that you carry in your man-purse for just such an occasion (bacon chocolate, salted caramel, and rose turkish delight are some favorites – interesting, but not too crazy). Once she gets that sugar rush, she’ll fall into your arms. Or into a diabetic coma. (It depends.)

The Shopping Sugarmama

The shopping sugarmama frequents high end malls & stores like Barney’s, Bloomingdale’s, and fancy boutiques. She is up on the latest fashions, and thinks nothing of throwing down thousands of dollars for the latest Manolo Blahniks (That’s a pair of shoes, guys! Quick tip: learn the names of all the designers!). If you’re lucky and become her man-pet, she’ll think nothing of throwing down beaucoup cash to dress you up, too. Get ready to rock that leather jumpsuit & diamond cock ring.

How to Approach the Shopping-Obsessed Rich Woman
Look your best. Toss your jeans off a bridge – instead, put on a pair of wool or cotton pants (no pleats! pleats are for lampshades!). Women always adore a polished man in a collared shirt, so burn all your t-shirts – or as I like to call them – sugarmama repellent! T-shirts are for babies and losers. And remember your accessories: a classic leather belt and leather dress shoes will take you further than those lame sneakers that everyone poor wears. Stand out from the crowd & spiff up a little, for god’s sake! Just dress better than a toddler, and you will have exceeded the standard outfits of 85% of men out there.

Stay tuned for part 3 in the series on Where to Meet a Wealthy Woman, coming up! Click here to subscribe to the RSS feed!

Until then, keep your eye on the prize! ;)